We do not treat people equally because all are equal. We treat people equally because all are different. These differences make everyone so valuable. One cannot exactly know how a person thinks or what experiences he has had thus one will never predict what kind of contribution that person can make to society.
In order to allow a person the maximum scope within which he is able to exploit his knowledge, talents and ambitions, and thus contribute something, law treats everyone the same so everyone has a level playing field. Arbitrary rules which elevate some while dragging other down are avoided. Discrimination and privileges are frowned upon. However this does not mean in any way that one must automatically like other people. Not liking someone is subjective and arbitrary. It dictates how one treats others in private personal relationships but it should not prevent one from recognising a person’s contributions.
In modern society there are few areas of life where illiberal discrimination still exists. Slavery has been abolished, women have been set free and given the vote, and justice no longer recognises a colour of a man, at least not in Europe and not in theory in USA. Since enlightenment we have been free to think. But even though most battles have been won by liberalism the war is not over. Probably the last area where prejudice and lack of respect for freedom of men still exist is in sexual orientation. Gay marriage is an example of a much wider fight for freedom of people to love who they truly love and not be coerced to betray their real feelings. It is also a fight for those feelings to be tolerated and accepted as just as valid as feelings of other people. Many argue against gay marriage because they do not want this tolerance to be allowed. Liberty, as it turns out, has enemies of all political creeds. Lets examine of the main arguments against gay marriage and by extension against gay rights.
Marriage, in a strictly utilitarian sense, is the commitment of two people to a lasting relationship and a signal to the rest of the world, predominantly to the state, to treat the pair as a unit. This manifests itself mostly in taxation, housing rights and other administrative policies.
As it stands right now marriage mostly remains a privilege of the heterosexual. The majority discriminates against the minority of homosexuals in dictating that they are not allowed to be recognised as married. But this fails to recognise the possible contributions same sex couples can make to our society. This discrimination is also silly, entirely arbitrary and dangerous.
In order to avoid sounding religious and dogmatic some may argue along the utilitarian path and say that the original point of marriage was to provide more stable conditions in which to raise children. This pre-dates all religious thought by the virtue of happening at the dawn of humanity, before superstition and other cognitive side effects created the idea of God. The argument says that same sex couples are incapable of having children so there is no point in gay couples having marriages. It is true that same sex couples cannot reproduce. Same sex couples can however adopt (another topic of gay rights movement) and provide a loving and carrying home just as often as heterosexual couples, as proven by research. Does this not mean that providing same sex couples an opportunity to marry will result on average in even better home for their adopted children? Don’t gay marriages encourage same sex couples to adopt unwanted children and provide them with a loving home and thus benefiting society? It seems that from a utilitarian point of view same sex couples provide a net benefit, especially to orphans.
One must recognise that extending the definition of marriage to same sex couples does not in any way damage the marriage between heterosexual couples. How can it? homosexual couples are not going to climb through the window at night and steal heterosexual couples' marriage certificate. Does extending the definition of marriage result in heterosexual couples losing their love or affect their marriage? Obviously not. Imagine a situation in a heterosexual relationship where one partner, lets say the husband, tell his wife “honey, same sex marriage now is allowed, I don’t think I love you anymore. We have to split up.” Of course this is ridiculous. Discriminating against same sex couples on these grounds is not rational. It is a whim, a silly opinion, it is arbitrary.
Saying that we ought to have discrimination in one arbitrary area of life and have equality in all other areas of life may result in loss of all equality. If we can arbitrarily discriminate in one area of life, why not two areas? How about three? How about all of them? This is what arbitrariness is. The slippery slope to loss of equality before the law is thus established.
It seems to me that by following the liberal principle of equality before the law and thus extending definition of marriage to same sex couples will result in more equality before the law and a clear benefit to society. It will not result in anything catastrophic. How can recognising love and commitment between two people be a bad thing? One is perfectly entitled to dislike the gays, but why try to coerce them, or prevent them from doing good for the rest?
In order to allow a person the maximum scope within which he is able to exploit his knowledge, talents and ambitions, and thus contribute something, law treats everyone the same so everyone has a level playing field. Arbitrary rules which elevate some while dragging other down are avoided. Discrimination and privileges are frowned upon. However this does not mean in any way that one must automatically like other people. Not liking someone is subjective and arbitrary. It dictates how one treats others in private personal relationships but it should not prevent one from recognising a person’s contributions.
In modern society there are few areas of life where illiberal discrimination still exists. Slavery has been abolished, women have been set free and given the vote, and justice no longer recognises a colour of a man, at least not in Europe and not in theory in USA. Since enlightenment we have been free to think. But even though most battles have been won by liberalism the war is not over. Probably the last area where prejudice and lack of respect for freedom of men still exist is in sexual orientation. Gay marriage is an example of a much wider fight for freedom of people to love who they truly love and not be coerced to betray their real feelings. It is also a fight for those feelings to be tolerated and accepted as just as valid as feelings of other people. Many argue against gay marriage because they do not want this tolerance to be allowed. Liberty, as it turns out, has enemies of all political creeds. Lets examine of the main arguments against gay marriage and by extension against gay rights.
Marriage, in a strictly utilitarian sense, is the commitment of two people to a lasting relationship and a signal to the rest of the world, predominantly to the state, to treat the pair as a unit. This manifests itself mostly in taxation, housing rights and other administrative policies.
As it stands right now marriage mostly remains a privilege of the heterosexual. The majority discriminates against the minority of homosexuals in dictating that they are not allowed to be recognised as married. But this fails to recognise the possible contributions same sex couples can make to our society. This discrimination is also silly, entirely arbitrary and dangerous.
In order to avoid sounding religious and dogmatic some may argue along the utilitarian path and say that the original point of marriage was to provide more stable conditions in which to raise children. This pre-dates all religious thought by the virtue of happening at the dawn of humanity, before superstition and other cognitive side effects created the idea of God. The argument says that same sex couples are incapable of having children so there is no point in gay couples having marriages. It is true that same sex couples cannot reproduce. Same sex couples can however adopt (another topic of gay rights movement) and provide a loving and carrying home just as often as heterosexual couples, as proven by research. Does this not mean that providing same sex couples an opportunity to marry will result on average in even better home for their adopted children? Don’t gay marriages encourage same sex couples to adopt unwanted children and provide them with a loving home and thus benefiting society? It seems that from a utilitarian point of view same sex couples provide a net benefit, especially to orphans.
One must recognise that extending the definition of marriage to same sex couples does not in any way damage the marriage between heterosexual couples. How can it? homosexual couples are not going to climb through the window at night and steal heterosexual couples' marriage certificate. Does extending the definition of marriage result in heterosexual couples losing their love or affect their marriage? Obviously not. Imagine a situation in a heterosexual relationship where one partner, lets say the husband, tell his wife “honey, same sex marriage now is allowed, I don’t think I love you anymore. We have to split up.” Of course this is ridiculous. Discriminating against same sex couples on these grounds is not rational. It is a whim, a silly opinion, it is arbitrary.
Saying that we ought to have discrimination in one arbitrary area of life and have equality in all other areas of life may result in loss of all equality. If we can arbitrarily discriminate in one area of life, why not two areas? How about three? How about all of them? This is what arbitrariness is. The slippery slope to loss of equality before the law is thus established.
It seems to me that by following the liberal principle of equality before the law and thus extending definition of marriage to same sex couples will result in more equality before the law and a clear benefit to society. It will not result in anything catastrophic. How can recognising love and commitment between two people be a bad thing? One is perfectly entitled to dislike the gays, but why try to coerce them, or prevent them from doing good for the rest?
1 comment:
This topic is a great one in that multiple issues are at stake really. There is the issue of discrimination based on sexual preference. There is the issue of what really is meant or intended by the term "marriage" in the first place. There is the issue of which demographic group or groups "own" the brand label "marriage." (i.e. is it owned by the heterosexual community, or by the religious community, or by the monogamous community, etc.) There is the issue of equal or unequal treatment of couples (hetero or homosexual) who engage in long term committed relationships but who choose not to "marry" under the law for whatever reason.
These multiple issues make this one, similar to the pro-choice/pro-life debates, capital punishment debates, war and interrogation debates, and even the debates over liberal and conservatism very difficult to discuss in a targetted and fully rational manner. Emotional charge tends to escalate, and non sequiters fly ever more frequently.
My thoughts, there is probably some substantiation to the claim by some heterosexuals that their demographic "owns" the brand. Surely, the heterosexual community has done its own very good job damaging the brand as it is. For a precious minority of them, committed heterosexual marriage open to children (own or adopted) and based on a selfless offering of ones service to spouse and family is a blessing. For many others, the institution of marriage is equivalent to job security for divorce lawyers.
This debate could easily go away if both the gay community, and the non-married heterosexually coupled community were simply granted the rights as couples they are seeking. Regardless whether the label "marriage" was attached. Truly, the term "marriage" from a legal perspective has very little permanent meaning. One can check into and out of the institution at will, the only impediment to checkout being the charitable attitude of the couple splitting up.
With appropriately equal legal rights, then the "non-heterosexually" committed communities could develop their own brand and label for their own special relationships. And, perhaps defend these much better than the heterosexual community has defended and protected the "marriage" brand.
I know many good people disagree with me on this, and for many good reasons. However, I come down where I do on this topic for really one general reason only. And that is that the "marriage" brand has very significant emotional value and meaning for much of the heterosexual community that owns it. As a people, we should be about protecting the diversity among us as much as we should be about defending equality of opportunity. Protecting the diversity of our ideals, because we are a language based society, means that we must also recognize that names and labels mean something important to the groups that own and define them. And are essential to communicating and maintaining that diversity. To usurp these simply because we like the benefits that have accumulated to the labels, without also embracing their intended meaning (by the group that owns them) is ... well ... theft. And destructive to intended and necessary self definition.
On the other hand, maintaining the various discriminatory laws and practices that exist in this area is unacceptable as well. Those need to be fixed.
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